Life is bloat
I have just finished playing this game called Mouthwashing that one of my good friends told me to play. Go read the review rn, but it made me feel something I hadn't before. It was a mix of sadness, confusion, anger, dissapointment, disgust and also anxiety. Lots and lots of intense anxiety. It got to the point where my brain was making up stuff and I nearly ended up deleting my github account because I was getting anxiety about how much I need to ditch Microsoft and install Arch on my primary PC.
While all this was going on, I was getting anxiety about how I keep thinking I made a friend I had round extremely uncomfortable by staring at them in an odd place even though I was spaced out and probably thinking about linux. This leads us to the primary topic of this blog post. Life is bloat. Who needs it? We experience so many emotions, which aren't needed for survival. Who acctually needs to feel disgust about how they look because they feel they will never get a partner because of how masculine they look? Nobody.
I don't know who the fuck needs to hear this, but the system of life is broken. You are raised in an immature environment. At age 4, while being barely concious, you are chucked into education. This immediatly forces you to conform to the system. You MUST write with your right hand. You MUST not talk while working. You MUST share things with other people. Why? Why should we write with our right hand, not socialise with others and collaborate and why should we share things with people that take so much from us?
After joining school, you "learn". School is not learning. School is not education. School is not humane. Why the fuck would anyone willingly send their child into an atmosphere of 30+ kids into a classroom with an underpayed and overworked teacher. Did you know 28% of students report being bullied? The keyword in this is report. Kids are too afraid to report things because of the negitive connotations of this word. Lets expand this shall we? Report, could mean to get someone in trouble with the law which has been drilled into kids as something bad to do because "snitches get stiches". The law is enforced wrong anyway. Report has connotations of intensity. Report has connotations of wrongdoing. Does anyone ever truly do right in this world?
Because of this world, I was always told to never start a sentance with because in school. Well, I think it fits fine right here. Just like the government sitting fine with 3% of kids aged 10-18 attempting sucide. That's just the kids who reported it, not even suceeded in this. I don't sit by this right. I contemplate it and then bury it into myself, because that is what "society" has taught me. What I say to this is FUCK YOU SOCIETY. We don't want any of this. We don't need any of this. We have never wanted, or needed or asked for any of this. So the statement stands